Well, not really. I have a lot to say.
Nobody wants to hear it. Ever. But, I say it anyway.
I have times when the anger grows so rapildy inside, that I can't stop the overflow of thoughts turned to words.
I have many that I can't suppress right now.
I would like to physically harm people at times. I think we all would.
I would like to grab them by thier shoulders, and shake them til they can't see straight.
But, then, it's because of them not seeing straight in the first place, that I am at this point of rage.
Perception is everything. No one person can perceive anything the same way that you do. It creates a lot of frustration at times.
All I know is that I have passed the stage of being passive, and letting well enough alone. I have crossed the line toward pure hate. It may very well be UN-HOLY, but at this point, I don't care.
Back stabbing, stealing, lying...none of those are HOLY acts.
This person will no longer be a part of my life.
This is my Intervention, my statement to you. You have lost me forever. I will no longer sit passive and let you stab me in my back while you laugh. I will no longer let you hurt me. Wall is Up.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Merry Thanks-Mas!
My Husband and I both worked on Thanksgiving this year, so we never got to have a Turkey dinner. The kids stayed with my Mom, and she had made a chicken dinner, which a couple of the kids expressed as disappointing.
I guess you don't realize how a break in tradition really affects a kid until it's broken.
So, D received a free turkey from his Union this week. We decided that the next time we are all home together in the evening, no soccer practice, no swim lessons, we would make our Turkey Dinner.
When I told the kids this morning at breakfast, Lulu shrieked in absolute glee! And she's the youngest, yet already the tradition is engrained IN her. They were thrilled! Which triggered a question, as well.
..."But if it's not Thanksgiving, or Christmas...then what is it? What do we call it?"
Think quick Mom! Well...."It's Thanks-Mas, ofcourse!"
They giggled.
My Chocolate Cake
My family recipe...Sweet Potato Casserole (really, it's yams)
I guess you don't realize how a break in tradition really affects a kid until it's broken.
So, D received a free turkey from his Union this week. We decided that the next time we are all home together in the evening, no soccer practice, no swim lessons, we would make our Turkey Dinner.
When I told the kids this morning at breakfast, Lulu shrieked in absolute glee! And she's the youngest, yet already the tradition is engrained IN her. They were thrilled! Which triggered a question, as well.
..."But if it's not Thanksgiving, or Christmas...then what is it? What do we call it?"
Think quick Mom! Well...."It's Thanks-Mas, ofcourse!"
They giggled.
So, today I made sweet potato casserole, a chocolate cake, mashed potatos with turkey gravy, stuffing, french green beans, rolls, and ofcourse, a Turkey. The kids sipped on sparkling apple cider. We made coffee after dinner, and my Parents & Sister even came.
We made our Turkey Dinner!
My Chocolate Cake
My family recipe...Sweet Potato Casserole (really, it's yams)
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Christmas Goodies
Every year I try to buy one or two new christmas decorations that call to me. Must haves.
This is just that.
I had to have it.
It's perfect!
I love how the price for Candy Canes says 5 cents. I also love that it's red. I love how the candy canes hang perfectly inside, not getting all scrunched together & breaking.
The next thing on my list is a vintage tree topper.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
I Heart Faces~ Pets Entry
My Entry for this weeks I Heart Faces photo contest, theme PETS.
King Oliver has slowly warmed up to the presence of our Christmas tree. He appears to be eyeing my Son's Nemo ornament. This was simply a lucky shot!
Candy House Caper
We finally made our Ginger Bread House.
One thing that always upsets me is the picture on the box of what the gingerbread house is supposed to look like, is never achievable. They never provide you with the proper candies in the kit to make your gingerbread house look like the one on the box. Lulu was upset because she wanted to make the windows the same. It was quickly forgotten once they started putting candies on the roof.
One thing that always upsets me is the picture on the box of what the gingerbread house is supposed to look like, is never achievable. They never provide you with the proper candies in the kit to make your gingerbread house look like the one on the box. Lulu was upset because she wanted to make the windows the same. It was quickly forgotten once they started putting candies on the roof.
Maybe it was I that was most bothered by the lack of certain supplied candies, preventing me from creating a work of art. But, then it's not about me, it's thier craft and they made it just fine. They applied the candies as Mommy applied the royal icing.
Mommy made a crooked doorway and windows. Oh well.
Lulu's side of roof
The Boys side of roof
Lulu informed me..."I can't wait til you & Dad are gone then I am gonna eat all the candy off!"
Sounds just like something she said a couple year ago as we were making our ginger bread house. Candy Lou!
I WILL know it was her when I come home and find 1/2 of the candy missing off the ginger bread house, and her response is, "Hooooow did you knooooow?"
They woke me this morning exclaiming that they had found candy in thier stockings.
I had received a bag of candies from work, a couple santa shaped chocolates, a couple mints, and I didn't want them so I had dropped them in the kids' stockings last night, thinking, they would never know til Christmas.
I was wrong.
They woke up and found them first thing.
So, I asked how they knew anything was in thier stocking. Both the Boy and Lulu said,
"We check our stockings everyday!"
Well, now why didn't I know that?
Sneaky little Monkeys!
I also realize that I only have one last Lulu that believes in Santa.
The Boy has informed me over & over that Daddy is Santa. Thing is...really, it's Mommy. Daddy never does the shopping!
I'm gonna have to muzzle him if he keeps yelling that there is no Santa, because I will not let him ruin the magic for my Little Lulu.
Well, now why didn't I know that?
Sneaky little Monkeys!
I also realize that I only have one last Lulu that believes in Santa.
The Boy has informed me over & over that Daddy is Santa. Thing is...really, it's Mommy. Daddy never does the shopping!
I'm gonna have to muzzle him if he keeps yelling that there is no Santa, because I will not let him ruin the magic for my Little Lulu.
Wednesday, December 08, 2010
Best & Worst of Christmas Past...
I was thinking of all the gifts in our past, gifts between my Husband and I. And some of the kids' gifts too that may have either been the best or worst gifts ever. I came up with a handful.
I'll start with the worst:
Our first christmas together, D did his shopping all on his own for me, no ideas, and no direction. I was very young, and maybe 116 lb. D gave me a white, ALL white, jogging suit. Now, if it had been black I would have worn it, but it was one of those things I smiled big for his benefit & then hid it in the back of my closet, fearful to return it and have him find out that I no longer have it, even though I never wore it & eventually ended up giving it to a friend of mine.
Our 2nd Christmast together, I had asked for a jean jacket. You know, a basic denim, button front, GAP style jean jacket. But, on christmas day, I opened up a box that held an oversized denim COAT, that hit me mid-thigh, was lined with plaid quilted flannel, and had huge brown marbled buttons all the way down. I felt like I was engulfed inside a bubble when I wore it. But, I hadn't the heart to say so, or to return it, and so I hid it in the closet with the white jog suit.
Almost every Christmas he also seems to get me JOVAN MUSK. I hadn't the heart to say I hated it at first, but after 10 years of it, I finally said...STOP. I haven't received a single Jovan Musk for 5 years. Hallelujah!
On to some of the best:
Our 3rd Christmas came...THE RING. He had me go look at rings with him, and all I wanted to emphasize was that I did NOT want your basic round diamond, I wanted a princess cut solitaire. He did well this time. I got my ring, it looked like I wanted it to, He proposed, all was good.
After that year, it seems everything I received revolved around cleaning or cooking.
I have received Magic Erasers in my stocking, Dutch Bros.Bucks, Coffee Punch Cards, Books, Gloves, A Photo Printer. One year He bought the family a new computer, and our first Digital Snapshot Camera, which was 1 month before the Boy was born...I took that camera over!
I've received...Dirt Devil Cone, a new broom (lame, but I still have that broom, it's the best one ever!) White merril nursing shoes when I was in nursing school. An external hard drive for my photos. Silver dime size hoop earrings, my favorite size. An electric blanket.
One year he went in with my parents & they bought me a Serger for sewing. Oh, and last year, his own idea...Seacret Hand Lotion/Nail Care kit. But, that was because he got one for his Mom, then it was BOGO, so he got one for his sister, and one for Grace, so I got one too. Still a nice gift.
Overall, He's done a decent job. Now, we shall see what evolves this year. He better out do Me, or atleast match my efforts.
As for the kids...
My worst purchases:
1. "Bargain" Karaoke Machine...it lasted maybe a few months, microphones were cr*p.
2. A make up kit for a preteen girl...especially when you have a toddling girl that likes to eat lipstick & do her own eye makeup when no one is looking.
3. ANYTHING from the dollar store toy section
4. Plastic Barbie house or van or plane...plastic breaks fast & easy from small ppl constantly opening/closing doors/flaps.
5. Samsung MP3 for $25...it wasn't even worth the $25 deal
6. Bendaroos... they leave a horrid waxy residue on everything!
Some of the Best:
1. Playdough playsets
2. Legos
3. Lincoln Logs
4. Ipod Nano for a Teen (itunes cards to go along)
5. Books
6. Dolls
7. Nerf ANYTHING
8. Video Games
9. Claire's Boutique gift cards for stocking for girls
10. Pop Beads ( Target has them)
11. Thomas the Train accessories for small boys
12. Polly Pocket
13. Build A Bear gift cards ( for AFTER the madness...)
Now, some of the best gifts I have gotten for D:
1. Clothes (I dress the man!)
2. Cabela's, Itunes, or Coffee Gift cards
3. Predator Call for hunting with the Boy
4. Almond Rocha...always in his stocking!
5. Socks & Underwear fill his stocking, again...I dress the man!
6. Hats
7. Ipod Nano
8. Walkie Talkies for Hunting
9. Hunting gear/accessories/clothing
10. Cologne, the good stuff...NO Jovan Musk.
11. Tackle boxes, fishing gear.
12. Pocket Watch
13. Carhaart Jacket
Now, Share some of your least & most favorite gifts!
I'll start with the worst:
Our first christmas together, D did his shopping all on his own for me, no ideas, and no direction. I was very young, and maybe 116 lb. D gave me a white, ALL white, jogging suit. Now, if it had been black I would have worn it, but it was one of those things I smiled big for his benefit & then hid it in the back of my closet, fearful to return it and have him find out that I no longer have it, even though I never wore it & eventually ended up giving it to a friend of mine.
Our 2nd Christmast together, I had asked for a jean jacket. You know, a basic denim, button front, GAP style jean jacket. But, on christmas day, I opened up a box that held an oversized denim COAT, that hit me mid-thigh, was lined with plaid quilted flannel, and had huge brown marbled buttons all the way down. I felt like I was engulfed inside a bubble when I wore it. But, I hadn't the heart to say so, or to return it, and so I hid it in the closet with the white jog suit.
Almost every Christmas he also seems to get me JOVAN MUSK. I hadn't the heart to say I hated it at first, but after 10 years of it, I finally said...STOP. I haven't received a single Jovan Musk for 5 years. Hallelujah!
On to some of the best:
Our 3rd Christmas came...THE RING. He had me go look at rings with him, and all I wanted to emphasize was that I did NOT want your basic round diamond, I wanted a princess cut solitaire. He did well this time. I got my ring, it looked like I wanted it to, He proposed, all was good.
After that year, it seems everything I received revolved around cleaning or cooking.
I have received Magic Erasers in my stocking, Dutch Bros.Bucks, Coffee Punch Cards, Books, Gloves, A Photo Printer. One year He bought the family a new computer, and our first Digital Snapshot Camera, which was 1 month before the Boy was born...I took that camera over!
I've received...Dirt Devil Cone, a new broom (lame, but I still have that broom, it's the best one ever!) White merril nursing shoes when I was in nursing school. An external hard drive for my photos. Silver dime size hoop earrings, my favorite size. An electric blanket.
One year he went in with my parents & they bought me a Serger for sewing. Oh, and last year, his own idea...Seacret Hand Lotion/Nail Care kit. But, that was because he got one for his Mom, then it was BOGO, so he got one for his sister, and one for Grace, so I got one too. Still a nice gift.
Overall, He's done a decent job. Now, we shall see what evolves this year. He better out do Me, or atleast match my efforts.
As for the kids...
My worst purchases:
1. "Bargain" Karaoke Machine...it lasted maybe a few months, microphones were cr*p.
2. A make up kit for a preteen girl...especially when you have a toddling girl that likes to eat lipstick & do her own eye makeup when no one is looking.
3. ANYTHING from the dollar store toy section
4. Plastic Barbie house or van or plane...plastic breaks fast & easy from small ppl constantly opening/closing doors/flaps.
5. Samsung MP3 for $25...it wasn't even worth the $25 deal
6. Bendaroos... they leave a horrid waxy residue on everything!
Some of the Best:
1. Playdough playsets
2. Legos
3. Lincoln Logs
4. Ipod Nano for a Teen (itunes cards to go along)
5. Books
6. Dolls
7. Nerf ANYTHING
8. Video Games
9. Claire's Boutique gift cards for stocking for girls
10. Pop Beads ( Target has them)
11. Thomas the Train accessories for small boys
12. Polly Pocket
13. Build A Bear gift cards ( for AFTER the madness...)
Now, some of the best gifts I have gotten for D:
1. Clothes (I dress the man!)
2. Cabela's, Itunes, or Coffee Gift cards
3. Predator Call for hunting with the Boy
4. Almond Rocha...always in his stocking!
5. Socks & Underwear fill his stocking, again...I dress the man!
6. Hats
7. Ipod Nano
8. Walkie Talkies for Hunting
9. Hunting gear/accessories/clothing
10. Cologne, the good stuff...NO Jovan Musk.
11. Tackle boxes, fishing gear.
12. Pocket Watch
13. Carhaart Jacket
Now, Share some of your least & most favorite gifts!
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
What a Woman really Wants...or atleast, What Makes My Boat Float!
I recently saw a blog post by another blogger sharing her most prized splurges.
I started thinking...some of mine were similar to hers, but not all.
My splurges weren't necessarily for me alone, but to use to share with my family.
I would have to say Numero Uno on MY list would be my Digital SLR purchase. I splurged for sure, atleast, for me it was a splurge. I love it.
No. 2 would have to be my KitchenAid stand mixer which I purchased at Costco. I don't know how I did all the baking I have done over the years without it. I will never go back to a hand mixer.
No. 3...Laptop. I don't know why I was so hesitant in the past to purchase one, but now that I have it, it's so convenient, and so much more comfortable to sit in a recliner and blog, vs. sitting at a desk!
My future splurges? Definitely a Dyson. It's a dream of mine. Also, new stainless steel bottom freezer, with icemaker refridgerator.
I'm easy to please.
I started thinking...some of mine were similar to hers, but not all.
My splurges weren't necessarily for me alone, but to use to share with my family.
I would have to say Numero Uno on MY list would be my Digital SLR purchase. I splurged for sure, atleast, for me it was a splurge. I love it.
No. 2 would have to be my KitchenAid stand mixer which I purchased at Costco. I don't know how I did all the baking I have done over the years without it. I will never go back to a hand mixer.
No. 3...Laptop. I don't know why I was so hesitant in the past to purchase one, but now that I have it, it's so convenient, and so much more comfortable to sit in a recliner and blog, vs. sitting at a desk!
My future splurges? Definitely a Dyson. It's a dream of mine. Also, new stainless steel bottom freezer, with icemaker refridgerator.
I'm easy to please.
Sunday, December 05, 2010
Santa likes Barbie's too!
So, we are down to just one little girl that still believes in the magic of Santa. And, boy does she! She ran to Santa's lap with so much exitement in her face. She lept up & told him how much she wants a Barbie house & car for christmas. She talked to him a little while, then grabbed her candy cane, and came running over to Mommy exclaiming "SANTA LIKES BARBIE'S TOO!" I had to giggle. She is so full of energy & enthusiasm. I can only imagine what she will dream about tonight.
Saturday, December 04, 2010
Perler Love
I <HEART> PERLER BEADS!
I am in love, deep deep love with Perler Beads. Toss aside the Bendaroo's, Moon Sand, Glitter Glue, Playdough...I am addicted to Perler Beads. They are absolutely MESS FREE. No more moon sand scattered throughout the house, no more playdough stuck in my carpets, no more bendaroo goo residue on my mirrors & windows & dining room table, no more glitter glue splattered around the breakfast bar. No No NOOOOO.
Today we made some super cute perler bead creations with a perler set I found last night at Michael's that has instructions for sweet treats like cakes, cocoa, gingerbread men, cupcakes, etc. Right up Lulu's alley.
The best thing is that it keeps them busy for hours before they really need my help. All I have to do is iron thier creations to melt the beads together. Both of the small ones are big enough now to count out the amount of beads needed to create what they see in the picture. And, it gets ALL the kids involved. Even the big girls & sometimes Grandma.
Lulu & I made a cup of hot cocoa, a donut & a cake with candles, while the Boy created his version of a Bakugan from perler beads, and I have to say, he hit it pretty much right on...
(Please make special effort to view our creations & ignore my old, run down wood table...it's one of those things the kids ruined...)
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
Sh*t My Kids Ruined
So, I came across this book in a magazine called Sh*t My Kids Ruined. Which got me thinking about all the hideous destructive, humorous & enraging things my 4 kids have managed to do over the past 15 years.
Let's see...we've had the lego in the nasal passageway, the tiny gem in the nasal passageway, and lets not forget the light bright pegs. Why does everything go UP the nose?
~A swallowed penny.
~The crayon mural on the textured wall in black, neon green & red.
~Eucerine cream head to toe, in the hair, on the eyelids, eyebrows, and impossible to wipe off!
~Blue marker head to toe...so THAT was why Drew was so quiet in the back seat @ 2yo.
~Blue's Clue's applesauce, add a little milk to overflow the cup, turns into blue milk. When spilled on ivory carpet creates a forever blue carpet stain! I really raged on that one.
~Purple grape soda spilled onto light blue carpet...thank god for Oxi Clean by that time!
~A very collectible TinkerBell cookie jar dropped on the kitchen floor & shattered into a million tiny pieces by one 2yo Boy looking for a cookie!
~Black crayon ran down the entire length of the ivory hallway wall.
~Red & Green gummy bear goo stuck to biege carpet fibers...fairly NEW carpet too.
~Green Glitter Glue explosion onto the kitchen cabinets.
~Overflowed poopy toilet through the entire bathroom.
~Ofcourse, the occassional random poop in the tub.
~Potty training, poop on living room carpet...::gag::
~Half eaten lipsticks by small girls.
~Red Sharpy drawings to unfinished oak wood shelving.
~Broken keys in locks.
~Broken car door handles.
~Spilled RED icee in the car...Lulu fell asleep with icee in hand.
~A web of abc gum in the back seat.
~ABC gum filled in power outlet in backseat of van.
~3 girls at different stages with gum in hair...No, ice does NOT get it out.
~Dents in car from bow & arrow practice by Boy.
~Baby slobber filled cell phone, ruined screen.
~TV remote buttons somehow disappear right off the remotes!
Let's see...we've had the lego in the nasal passageway, the tiny gem in the nasal passageway, and lets not forget the light bright pegs. Why does everything go UP the nose?
~A swallowed penny.
~The crayon mural on the textured wall in black, neon green & red.
~Eucerine cream head to toe, in the hair, on the eyelids, eyebrows, and impossible to wipe off!
~Blue marker head to toe...so THAT was why Drew was so quiet in the back seat @ 2yo.
~Blue's Clue's applesauce, add a little milk to overflow the cup, turns into blue milk. When spilled on ivory carpet creates a forever blue carpet stain! I really raged on that one.
~Purple grape soda spilled onto light blue carpet...thank god for Oxi Clean by that time!
~A very collectible TinkerBell cookie jar dropped on the kitchen floor & shattered into a million tiny pieces by one 2yo Boy looking for a cookie!
~Black crayon ran down the entire length of the ivory hallway wall.
~Red & Green gummy bear goo stuck to biege carpet fibers...fairly NEW carpet too.
~Green Glitter Glue explosion onto the kitchen cabinets.
~Overflowed poopy toilet through the entire bathroom.
~Ofcourse, the occassional random poop in the tub.
~Potty training, poop on living room carpet...::gag::
~Half eaten lipsticks by small girls.
~Red Sharpy drawings to unfinished oak wood shelving.
~Broken keys in locks.
~Broken car door handles.
~Spilled RED icee in the car...Lulu fell asleep with icee in hand.
~A web of abc gum in the back seat.
~ABC gum filled in power outlet in backseat of van.
~3 girls at different stages with gum in hair...No, ice does NOT get it out.
~Dents in car from bow & arrow practice by Boy.
~Baby slobber filled cell phone, ruined screen.
~TV remote buttons somehow disappear right off the remotes!
~Projectile vomit on My queen size down comforter (needless to say, that was tossed out, no washing option)
~OODP...Leah, @ a few months of age, had the most horrendous out-of-diaper-poop (OODP) while @ the library, on my lap, baby poop running down my leg as I try to carry baby, and direct 1 yo out of library to car, also attempting to hide the poop, cuz I had no change of clothes for baby or Mommy.
~OODP...Leah, @ a few months of age, had the most horrendous out-of-diaper-poop (OODP) while @ the library, on my lap, baby poop running down my leg as I try to carry baby, and direct 1 yo out of library to car, also attempting to hide the poop, cuz I had no change of clothes for baby or Mommy.
~Red Lipstick left in a jeans pocket, ran thru washer/dryer, leaving red blotched stains on every pair of jeans!
I'm losing memory @ this point, but I'm sure there's many more. Never a dull moment with small ones!
I'm losing memory @ this point, but I'm sure there's many more. Never a dull moment with small ones!
One thing I have learned through all of this, is that there a few things that are absolutely necessary to keep in your home while raising small children.
1. Goo Gone
2. Magic Erasers
3. OxiClean
4.Fels Naptha soap (for laundry stains)
5.Tweezers ( to remove foreign objects from tiny noses)
6. A Padded Room ( For Mommy to throw her tantrum in before setting forth to clean, fix, or rectify any of the above named situations)
Monday, November 29, 2010
It's a Cupcake Hat!
Once again, a lovely giveaway from Pamela Topping Photography! The Pom Pom Hat, it's a cupcake! Leah would love this! Go enter to win for yourself!
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Super Duper Deals!
So, I got this voucher/gift certificate in the mail for $25 with no minimum purchase necessary for Mini Boden. I have ordered random items in past, a t-shirt that was interesting, a pair of pants on clearance, a sundress...but never a large order by any means, so this really surprised me. I mean, Mini Boden just giving away $25? Its just unheard of!
One thing I fell in love with this fall was the Jersey Lined Cargo Camo Skate pants with elasticized waistline, rough & tough, perfect for my Boy. I ordered a pair with a % off in early fall, and he has by far loved them as well, the most out of all his pants. They are incredibly warm, and I swear they are made of magical fabric being that they withstand a tremendous beating!
My first instinct then when I received this voucher was to get the Boy another pair of these amazingly tough MiniBoden Lined Skate Pants . They retail for $46. Shipping is $10. But, with a quick service number from the recent catalog for 25% off + free ship, and THEN the deduction of the $25 voucher, I paid a mere $9.50!
Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Mini Boden! My Boy will now have the Peat Camoflauge & Airforce Camoflauge!
One thing I fell in love with this fall was the Jersey Lined Cargo Camo Skate pants with elasticized waistline, rough & tough, perfect for my Boy. I ordered a pair with a % off in early fall, and he has by far loved them as well, the most out of all his pants. They are incredibly warm, and I swear they are made of magical fabric being that they withstand a tremendous beating!
My first instinct then when I received this voucher was to get the Boy another pair of these amazingly tough MiniBoden Lined Skate Pants . They retail for $46. Shipping is $10. But, with a quick service number from the recent catalog for 25% off + free ship, and THEN the deduction of the $25 voucher, I paid a mere $9.50!
Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Mini Boden! My Boy will now have the Peat Camoflauge & Airforce Camoflauge!
Simplicity Patterns - Simplicity Craft Pattern
Simplicity Patterns - Simplicity Craft Pattern
So, the kids are so in love with the felt cake I made yesterday, I have had requests from family to make one for thier kids! I love that! Above is a link to the pattern I used,it is Simplicity 2445. I got it on sale during the $1 Simplicity pattern sale 5/$5, max 10 patterns, and you can bet I bought 10!
I have been using the leftover felt remnants from making halloween costumes, and today I was able to cut out the needed pattern pieces for 4 cakes, and 5 cupcakes with whip cream topping. These are by far the funnest sewing craft I have done in awhile!
I plan to get Drew involved this evening, and Lulu is my stuffer! It's a family affair!
So, the kids are so in love with the felt cake I made yesterday, I have had requests from family to make one for thier kids! I love that! Above is a link to the pattern I used,it is Simplicity 2445. I got it on sale during the $1 Simplicity pattern sale 5/$5, max 10 patterns, and you can bet I bought 10!
I have been using the leftover felt remnants from making halloween costumes, and today I was able to cut out the needed pattern pieces for 4 cakes, and 5 cupcakes with whip cream topping. These are by far the funnest sewing craft I have done in awhile!
I plan to get Drew involved this evening, and Lulu is my stuffer! It's a family affair!
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Who doesn't love Chocolate Cake?
Especially one that is mess, bake, fat, & sugar free! Again today, Lulu & I made some felt goodies! She stuffed & I sewed. She is so excited to add this to her kitchen collection! It has renewed her interest in play baking. It is so easy to do, and I love how interested it is making her in sewing. I definitely want to pass on my passion and knowledge for sewing to atleast one of my daughters, and I am thinking it will be Lulu that ends up recieving it!
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
The Peace never lasts for long...
I had such a peaceful morning. I took it slow, did some housework, browsed online for more information regarding the trip to Seattle, got some chili cooking in the crock pot, picked up Leah from kindergarten, and we came home to finish some chores, then we dug out a pattern to make some felt cupcakes.
I had everything already that we needed in the craft supplies, Lulu loves cupcakes in any shape or form, so it was really fun including her in the making, even though she couldn't sew, she stuffed the cupcake for me as I made the 'whipped cream'.
It turned out really cute, although, I see the flaws, and next time will make some adjustments to the pattern. We got the pattern at the $1 simplicity pattern sale @ Joann's Fabrics last weekend. I was able to grab 10 great patterns for costumes, dresses, skirts, felt food, and organizers for the kids rooms. I love to sew.
However, as the day progressed, and the other 3 kids arrived home from school, my peaceful day turned sour. The P.D.Q. decided to hit the Boy on his shoulder with the remote control because he had stuck his tongue out at her as he walked by the couch. I swatted her one, sent her to her room, cooincidentally the Boy and Lulu went to thier rooms to play and shortly thereafter I hear a scream from Lulu & the Boy had hit her for some ridiculous reason I cannot recall, Mommy Memory loss. All I do know is, I will not allow them to hit eachother! I 'pank, and I will never stop. If they are risking their safety, or just being plain mean, and nasty, disobeying me, they get a good 'pank. And, he knew it was coming, he took it like a Man, which kinda made me a little more angry, seeing him hide the tears. I mean, I wonder if he felt it?
Then, my slow cooked chili dinner, nice hot fresh from the oven cornbread...was turned away by all 4 kids. I thought it tasted great, a wonderful winters eve meal. But, all they ate was the cornbread. Bleh on them! The Boy did mention that it would've been a great meal for his friend that plays football because it had a lot of protein the beans and meat! That's my Handsome!
The evening ended better with swim lessons for small ones, and a quick trip to ColdStone for a free sample treat as a reward for trying thier hardest. Lulu has dramatically improved in the water with only the promise of icecream ;)
Monsters in my Heater Vent
The Boy has recently become terribly frightened by any noise that he hears in his room @ bedtime. He has a night light, but he still insists the bathroom light be left on too. I refuse to do this.
About 10 minutes after I put him to bed, he is back up running down the hall to my bedroom begging to stay up or sleep with Mom & Dad. I have taken the vent off the heater to show him that nothing is there. I have explained that when the heater kicks on it will create a noise, but he still insists that there is a monster in there trying to get out & get him!
So, the last two nights, we put him to bed around 8:30, and by 10:30pm we have checked on him only to find that he somehow escaped to his sisters room & is already fast asleep. The first night he was even crafty enough to strategically place the pillows just right to make it appear as if he were still in his own bed. Smart little guy!
I just don't know what to do. He has no reason to be scared. It's all in his imagination. I have never had any of the girls continue to be scared past the age of 4 or 5. Lulu goes to bed so easily. This Boy is making me crazy @ bedtime!
About 10 minutes after I put him to bed, he is back up running down the hall to my bedroom begging to stay up or sleep with Mom & Dad. I have taken the vent off the heater to show him that nothing is there. I have explained that when the heater kicks on it will create a noise, but he still insists that there is a monster in there trying to get out & get him!
So, the last two nights, we put him to bed around 8:30, and by 10:30pm we have checked on him only to find that he somehow escaped to his sisters room & is already fast asleep. The first night he was even crafty enough to strategically place the pillows just right to make it appear as if he were still in his own bed. Smart little guy!
I just don't know what to do. He has no reason to be scared. It's all in his imagination. I have never had any of the girls continue to be scared past the age of 4 or 5. Lulu goes to bed so easily. This Boy is making me crazy @ bedtime!
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Sweet 16 in Seattle?
My Big Girl is turning 16 next June & I am planning a road trip for her & I to Seattle. I have always wanted to go there, and rather than spend hundreds on a ridiculous sweet 16 party, I thought it would be great to get her out of town and to a place she might not see otherwise at the age of 16.
I have some ideas of what we may do, and see, but I am really not sure what all there is to see & do.
I found this great site... Thing to See and Do in Seattle . It has many great places to go with prices and description, as well as a link to the site for the attraction. My main concern is finding a decently priced hotel though. I want to give her a memorable experience. I am planning on it only being her & I, possibly another friend or two, Grandma maybe. Not sure. But, I want to be able to have fun & be spontaneous with my Big Girl! She is growing up so fast!
Almost Sweet Sixteen...I can't believe it!
I have some ideas of what we may do, and see, but I am really not sure what all there is to see & do.
I found this great site... Thing to See and Do in Seattle . It has many great places to go with prices and description, as well as a link to the site for the attraction. My main concern is finding a decently priced hotel though. I want to give her a memorable experience. I am planning on it only being her & I, possibly another friend or two, Grandma maybe. Not sure. But, I want to be able to have fun & be spontaneous with my Big Girl! She is growing up so fast!
Almost Sweet Sixteen...I can't believe it!
Thursday, November 11, 2010
The New Preteen Drama Queen
Drew is 10. She is an amazing girl. I love her very much. She is a tomboy. She is an incredible soccer player. She is very intelligent. She is a successful student & loved by her teachers, always. Never gets in trouble at school, which is a huge difference from my last Preteen Drama Queen. However, she is 10. She is nearing the teen years rapidly. I now give her the title of Preteen Drama Queen, because she has earned it recently.
Hormones are at thier peak. I am very sure that she will be meeting "Auntie Flow" very soon. I am also very sure that she will be the twin to Kara, from Dan in Real Life when it comes to expressing herself in these preteen/teen years to come. I think I am gonna have my hands full.
She has always been pretty intense. At the age of 2, she threw 'exorcist'-like tantrums over taking a nap. At the age of 4, she balled her head off when we told her she was getting another baby brother/sister. At the age of 5, she would cry a river over my putting pretty ponytails in her hair, missing the bus over pleading for me to take them out. She lacks the ability to calm herself down.
I blame D. I blame D because...when Drew was a baby, D worked all dayshifts. I had to sleep on the couch with her, always holding her, to keep her quiet so he could sleep. I was never able to let her cry it out, for fear of waking D. He is a BEAR. I think this directly relates to her personality/behaviour. She never learned to calm herself, I always ran to pick her up quickly and calm her. I really hate myself for that.
Drew is a great kid, though. She doesn't really get into trouble. She is busy with soccer, friends, and she loves to make things. I just don't usually have to get on to her. Until the past few weeks. She was grounded for a week recently.
All of my kids are very rarely in trouble at this point. It's been very comforting to know that they get it, they are all old enough to know better. It's nice not having a troublesome toddler running around anymore. But, honestly, a preteen drama queen is so much more stressfull for me than a toddler.
I just can't stand the pleading, dramatic fits, and crying over not getting to play with a friend after just spending a couple hours with another friend. The constant need to be with a friend, or doing/going. The constant bickering with her little brother. The yelling at her little sister for coming in her room. The tears roll instant, the fits are like a 2 yo. It just makes me wanna cringe & hide, but I have to stand up firm & unwavering. I have to be strong. Be consistent. Be a mind reader. Be one step ahead.
It really doesn't get easier as they get older. It gets much harder. I would have to say 10 is the worst for a girl. It's an inbetween, an awkward stage. The verge of puberty, middle school. The desire for increased independence from Mom & Dad. The NEED to be with a friend every minute of every day. The demands to do only what they want to do, with no regard for anyone else. It's a very self-centered state that she is in right now, and it's so hard to deal with on a daily basis. I want to lock her up and throw away the key for atleast 2 years.
Why can't she BE like she LOOKS in this picture I found. Calm, collected...
Lord, Help Me. I fear I may harm this girl in her preteen years.
Hormones are at thier peak. I am very sure that she will be meeting "Auntie Flow" very soon. I am also very sure that she will be the twin to Kara, from Dan in Real Life when it comes to expressing herself in these preteen/teen years to come. I think I am gonna have my hands full.
She has always been pretty intense. At the age of 2, she threw 'exorcist'-like tantrums over taking a nap. At the age of 4, she balled her head off when we told her she was getting another baby brother/sister. At the age of 5, she would cry a river over my putting pretty ponytails in her hair, missing the bus over pleading for me to take them out. She lacks the ability to calm herself down.
I blame D. I blame D because...when Drew was a baby, D worked all dayshifts. I had to sleep on the couch with her, always holding her, to keep her quiet so he could sleep. I was never able to let her cry it out, for fear of waking D. He is a BEAR. I think this directly relates to her personality/behaviour. She never learned to calm herself, I always ran to pick her up quickly and calm her. I really hate myself for that.
Drew is a great kid, though. She doesn't really get into trouble. She is busy with soccer, friends, and she loves to make things. I just don't usually have to get on to her. Until the past few weeks. She was grounded for a week recently.
All of my kids are very rarely in trouble at this point. It's been very comforting to know that they get it, they are all old enough to know better. It's nice not having a troublesome toddler running around anymore. But, honestly, a preteen drama queen is so much more stressfull for me than a toddler.
I just can't stand the pleading, dramatic fits, and crying over not getting to play with a friend after just spending a couple hours with another friend. The constant need to be with a friend, or doing/going. The constant bickering with her little brother. The yelling at her little sister for coming in her room. The tears roll instant, the fits are like a 2 yo. It just makes me wanna cringe & hide, but I have to stand up firm & unwavering. I have to be strong. Be consistent. Be a mind reader. Be one step ahead.
It really doesn't get easier as they get older. It gets much harder. I would have to say 10 is the worst for a girl. It's an inbetween, an awkward stage. The verge of puberty, middle school. The desire for increased independence from Mom & Dad. The NEED to be with a friend every minute of every day. The demands to do only what they want to do, with no regard for anyone else. It's a very self-centered state that she is in right now, and it's so hard to deal with on a daily basis. I want to lock her up and throw away the key for atleast 2 years.
Why can't she BE like she LOOKS in this picture I found. Calm, collected...
Lord, Help Me. I fear I may harm this girl in her preteen years.
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Lost & Found
I have to share this. It's not everyday you recover and long lost or stolen item. Especially in todays world. Especially an electronic item. Especially an Ipod stolen @ school.
My Big Girl had a horrible run with ipods the past 2 years. In 2008 she asked for a yellow ipod for christmas. It was a big deal for her. I gave in and 'Santa' granted her wish. She loved it! But, it kept breaking, and freezing. So, she had it replaced with a new one under the 1 year warrantee, paying $40 shipping. When she got that one, she might have had it for a couple weeks before it was engulfed in hairspray that had leaked out in her purse, frying the new Ipod. 2 Ipods=History...
At this point, I forced her to earn the money herself if she ever wanted another. About that time, the newest 5th generation with video Ipod was released. So, ofcourse, being a teen, she wanted video on her new Ipod! She babysat, and saved the money to buy it. She special ordered it in metallic yellow, with the engraving on the back of:
'Take a look at yourself
and make a change"
...and after having recieved it, she programmed in the lock code 1958...Michael Jackson's birth year. She's an MJ freak. However, these clues were magical!
I was browsing craigslist for used Ipods,(Drew wants one for xmas, but she's not too responsible, so we figured used was a better option for her)when I found a listing for an 8gb gold Ipod nano, simple title. I took a look.
Gosh.Golly.Gee. It sure looked a lot like my Girls Ipod. I ran thru the description match, and decided I would email and ask the boy selling this Ipod, what does the engraving say? He never responded by morning, so with pressure from D & My Dad, I called the police station to see if I could even get them to help me out. It's been months since her Ipod was stolen.
They took my report seriously, took my detailed description of the engraving, lock code, the boy's name, cell #, etc...and went to the school, confiscated the Ipod from him with the Boy admitting only that he FOUND IT ON THE FLOOR IN THE HALL. Stating it MUST have fallen out of my Big Girl's Purse. However, he is still being charged with theft of personal property. That'll teach him. Don't mess with me & mine!
My Big Girl had a horrible run with ipods the past 2 years. In 2008 she asked for a yellow ipod for christmas. It was a big deal for her. I gave in and 'Santa' granted her wish. She loved it! But, it kept breaking, and freezing. So, she had it replaced with a new one under the 1 year warrantee, paying $40 shipping. When she got that one, she might have had it for a couple weeks before it was engulfed in hairspray that had leaked out in her purse, frying the new Ipod. 2 Ipods=History...
At this point, I forced her to earn the money herself if she ever wanted another. About that time, the newest 5th generation with video Ipod was released. So, ofcourse, being a teen, she wanted video on her new Ipod! She babysat, and saved the money to buy it. She special ordered it in metallic yellow, with the engraving on the back of:
'Take a look at yourself
and make a change"
...and after having recieved it, she programmed in the lock code 1958...Michael Jackson's birth year. She's an MJ freak. However, these clues were magical!
I was browsing craigslist for used Ipods,(Drew wants one for xmas, but she's not too responsible, so we figured used was a better option for her)when I found a listing for an 8gb gold Ipod nano, simple title. I took a look.
Gosh.Golly.Gee. It sure looked a lot like my Girls Ipod. I ran thru the description match, and decided I would email and ask the boy selling this Ipod, what does the engraving say? He never responded by morning, so with pressure from D & My Dad, I called the police station to see if I could even get them to help me out. It's been months since her Ipod was stolen.
They took my report seriously, took my detailed description of the engraving, lock code, the boy's name, cell #, etc...and went to the school, confiscated the Ipod from him with the Boy admitting only that he FOUND IT ON THE FLOOR IN THE HALL. Stating it MUST have fallen out of my Big Girl's Purse. However, he is still being charged with theft of personal property. That'll teach him. Don't mess with me & mine!
Monday, November 08, 2010
Orange Rocks!
I am entering this picture for the I Heart Faces contest-Orange theme this week, because I just love the look on her face, the power in her kick, and the motion of the orange ball flying away! Her Team was undeafeated this fall season.
2nd opinion
Lulu has had 2 vision screening tests this fall. Once with her vaccination appt. @ the doctors office, and once @ school. Both have shown that she has 20/30 vision on the left, and 20/40 vision on the right. I am not sure what to think abt this, but the Dr. suggested I have her looked at by an Opthamologist with the first test results. I chose to hold off to see what the school vision screening would show.
I have web searched to find any further information, or suggestions. I suppose also looking for something that tells me that these numbers don't matter. But, I keep finding information that leads to having Lulu see the eye doc.
This makes me sad. I don't want my Sweet Little Lulu to have to wear glasses!
She reads all the time, has never had any trouble in school, or with her eyes. She never complains of her eye bugging her, or a headache. She is very successful with her school work, and reading. I am confused.
It's my responsibility to make sure she is cared for properly, medically. But, I am so hesitant to take her to the Opthamologist. I don't want to jump the gun, maybe waiting for 1st grades eye screen would be better? Hmmm...
I have web searched to find any further information, or suggestions. I suppose also looking for something that tells me that these numbers don't matter. But, I keep finding information that leads to having Lulu see the eye doc.
This makes me sad. I don't want my Sweet Little Lulu to have to wear glasses!
She reads all the time, has never had any trouble in school, or with her eyes. She never complains of her eye bugging her, or a headache. She is very successful with her school work, and reading. I am confused.
It's my responsibility to make sure she is cared for properly, medically. But, I am so hesitant to take her to the Opthamologist. I don't want to jump the gun, maybe waiting for 1st grades eye screen would be better? Hmmm...
Saturday, November 06, 2010
That's MY Rule & I'm stickin' to it!
Drew is grounded. She received this judgement tuesday evening after a short bout of defiance. That's not the only thing that earned her a week of house arrest. It was also a few other things leading up to that night over 2 weeks time.
Strike 1: I found an apple in the bathroom garbage. A whole, new, shiny, red apple. An apple I had just bought 2 days before @ a rate of 1.79/dozen. I mean, this apple was GIGANTIC. I had place it in her lunch box the prior day. So, when she got home from school I asked her about it. She said it was too big, and she couldn't finish it, so she threw it away. I had to giggle. Why? Well, cuz it was a lie. The apple had no sign of being bitten, no bruises, no punctured skin. I inspected this apple thorougly, you see, to try to understand it's purpose for being in the garbage at all. So, we revisited my rule about NOT throwing away food that you can't finish, it must be brought home and replaced to the fridge, or saved for the next days lunch.
Strike 2: D had given her $10 to take to a post Soccer Pizza Party. She paid for some pizza, games, drink...she was supposed to return the change to D. He asked her for it, she said it was in her jeans, a total of $2, and would get it out the following day. D worked, so after school, I asked her abt the $. She denied having change. I reminded her that she had told her Dad that there was indeed $2 change, so WHERE DID IT GO? She ho-hummed around for a bit, before she finally admitted that she used it to buy drinks at school. But, that doesn't make sense cuz I send cold lunch and always pack a drink. So, after further probing, she finally admitted that she actually paid a charge for drinks she purchased cuz she didn't like the drinks I send. Hmmmm, this was reminding me of the apple. She was throwing away drinks to get a different one at school.
Strike 3,4...5: Incessant, persistent, aggressive behaviour toward her Brother & I. Raging hormones in a pre-teen body, presenting themselves in a demon-like state.
So, the last straw was blatant defiance toward me, in front of her Grandparents.
I grounded her for a week, you see, simply to ensure it included a weekend. A weekend that included a very much awaited Birthday Party Sleepover she had been invited to. An event that she screamed thru dramatic sobs & streaming tears was 'SUPPOSED TO BE THE BESTEST PARTY EVER!' So, you see, I knew THIS was the time to stick to my word. Her tantrum lasted a few hours. It was pitiful. Disgusting. But, necessary to endure. Necessary to follow thru & not give in to the noise & distrubance for MY sanity sake.
Yesterday was the party. I arrived home from grocery shopping to a re-newed dramatization of her NEED to go to this party. I held strong. Maintained the punishment. She sobbed for about an hour, pleading that if I let her go, she would be good forever. Statements like this make me smile & giggle under my breath, so pathetic. I wasn't giving in. NO. See, if I gave in at this point, then next time, it will be even worse & she will not have learned a thing! This is my job. To make her miserable. I simply told her, "I didn't get what I want (respect, obedience, truth)...so, you don't get what YOU want (a fabulous sleepover party, friends, cake...)"
Today, she is much more obedient. It definitely tested me, but it has taught her.
Strike 1: I found an apple in the bathroom garbage. A whole, new, shiny, red apple. An apple I had just bought 2 days before @ a rate of 1.79/dozen. I mean, this apple was GIGANTIC. I had place it in her lunch box the prior day. So, when she got home from school I asked her about it. She said it was too big, and she couldn't finish it, so she threw it away. I had to giggle. Why? Well, cuz it was a lie. The apple had no sign of being bitten, no bruises, no punctured skin. I inspected this apple thorougly, you see, to try to understand it's purpose for being in the garbage at all. So, we revisited my rule about NOT throwing away food that you can't finish, it must be brought home and replaced to the fridge, or saved for the next days lunch.
Strike 2: D had given her $10 to take to a post Soccer Pizza Party. She paid for some pizza, games, drink...she was supposed to return the change to D. He asked her for it, she said it was in her jeans, a total of $2, and would get it out the following day. D worked, so after school, I asked her abt the $. She denied having change. I reminded her that she had told her Dad that there was indeed $2 change, so WHERE DID IT GO? She ho-hummed around for a bit, before she finally admitted that she used it to buy drinks at school. But, that doesn't make sense cuz I send cold lunch and always pack a drink. So, after further probing, she finally admitted that she actually paid a charge for drinks she purchased cuz she didn't like the drinks I send. Hmmmm, this was reminding me of the apple. She was throwing away drinks to get a different one at school.
Strike 3,4...5: Incessant, persistent, aggressive behaviour toward her Brother & I. Raging hormones in a pre-teen body, presenting themselves in a demon-like state.
So, the last straw was blatant defiance toward me, in front of her Grandparents.
I grounded her for a week, you see, simply to ensure it included a weekend. A weekend that included a very much awaited Birthday Party Sleepover she had been invited to. An event that she screamed thru dramatic sobs & streaming tears was 'SUPPOSED TO BE THE BESTEST PARTY EVER!' So, you see, I knew THIS was the time to stick to my word. Her tantrum lasted a few hours. It was pitiful. Disgusting. But, necessary to endure. Necessary to follow thru & not give in to the noise & distrubance for MY sanity sake.
Yesterday was the party. I arrived home from grocery shopping to a re-newed dramatization of her NEED to go to this party. I held strong. Maintained the punishment. She sobbed for about an hour, pleading that if I let her go, she would be good forever. Statements like this make me smile & giggle under my breath, so pathetic. I wasn't giving in. NO. See, if I gave in at this point, then next time, it will be even worse & she will not have learned a thing! This is my job. To make her miserable. I simply told her, "I didn't get what I want (respect, obedience, truth)...so, you don't get what YOU want (a fabulous sleepover party, friends, cake...)"
Today, she is much more obedient. It definitely tested me, but it has taught her.
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
Rainbows & Balloons
Today is such an amazingly beautiful day! I love it. The sun shining ever so brightly thru all the windows, reminding me that I haven't dusted in awhile...
The reflections of this big, beautiful sunshine randomly placed tiny rainbows on my walls and kitchen flooring. Little Lulu noticed right away and ran around counting them. Ofcourse, my scientific little Man had to ask why they were there, and so we had a quick lesson in prisms/reflection of light before running of to school this morning.
You just never know what a day may bring.;)
These blue skies are filling my mind with happy thoughts, and big ideas. A few of those ideas include: a huge, colorful balloon bouquet, a camera, and a huge field of green. A park. A picnic...the ocean & sand.
I just feel like smiling today. With pink lipstick on.
The reflections of this big, beautiful sunshine randomly placed tiny rainbows on my walls and kitchen flooring. Little Lulu noticed right away and ran around counting them. Ofcourse, my scientific little Man had to ask why they were there, and so we had a quick lesson in prisms/reflection of light before running of to school this morning.
You just never know what a day may bring.;)
These blue skies are filling my mind with happy thoughts, and big ideas. A few of those ideas include: a huge, colorful balloon bouquet, a camera, and a huge field of green. A park. A picnic...the ocean & sand.
I just feel like smiling today. With pink lipstick on.
Tuesday, November 02, 2010
Decisions
Now the Mother of all school age children, I find that things are busier than ever. I remember thinking, "Once they all get into school, it won't be so crazy, it will calm down." But, rather, the complete opposite.
Life has become so hectic, confusing. I have my own desires to do things now, and am struggling with the decision of either following thru with it, or stacking it on that shelf, like many other things I have in the past, to keep my focus on the children, keep up, on top of, be aware, alert...for them, about them, concerning them.
I love being a Mother. But, I need to explore other parts of Me that I have submerged for the past 15 years. Emotions, needs, desires, interests. Do I try to explore? Or submit.
I wanted to try out for Roller Derby after seeing an amazing Derby Bout just before Halloween. I loved it! I love to Roller Skate. So, I went to the new skater day. I did my best to learn a few tricks, but during a relay at the end, lost my balance, and fell directly on my rear end on concrete flooring. I was so humiliated. A feeling I despise. A feeling I don't feel. Ever. Confidence lost. Fear intruded. I just got out of therapy last spring...wth am I thinking? was all I could tell myself over and over and over in my head. It was a real mind f*ck. Do I continue, cuz I really, really want to, or stop, be 'safe'. Don't take the risk, for the risk is not mine to take? I'm so confused.
Life has become so hectic, confusing. I have my own desires to do things now, and am struggling with the decision of either following thru with it, or stacking it on that shelf, like many other things I have in the past, to keep my focus on the children, keep up, on top of, be aware, alert...for them, about them, concerning them.
I love being a Mother. But, I need to explore other parts of Me that I have submerged for the past 15 years. Emotions, needs, desires, interests. Do I try to explore? Or submit.
I wanted to try out for Roller Derby after seeing an amazing Derby Bout just before Halloween. I loved it! I love to Roller Skate. So, I went to the new skater day. I did my best to learn a few tricks, but during a relay at the end, lost my balance, and fell directly on my rear end on concrete flooring. I was so humiliated. A feeling I despise. A feeling I don't feel. Ever. Confidence lost. Fear intruded. I just got out of therapy last spring...wth am I thinking? was all I could tell myself over and over and over in my head. It was a real mind f*ck. Do I continue, cuz I really, really want to, or stop, be 'safe'. Don't take the risk, for the risk is not mine to take? I'm so confused.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
The Great Outdoors
Our Annual trip to Central Oregon. What an adventure it is now that the small ones have grown into such BIG little kids. It truly is a necessary thing to camp with your kids no matter how busy you might find yourself to be. It is so important for them to see & appreciate nature, the sheer beauty of the trees and lakes. I absolutely LOVE it!
D had worked the Boy up for this trip, he was so wound up & ready to go once we got there to fish, hunt, kill ANYTHING. He had D going from sun up til sun down with demands of fishing every water way, hunting coyote, and killing a porcupine. He insisted on wearing Camoflauge, so he used his army costume I made for halloween, a camo tee D got @ walmart, a hat he found @ BiMart with a badger target on the front & fake blood splatter on the back. He used his school backpack, which was camo, that I had just gotten at the outlets. He was ready to HUNT WITH DAD. That is, until one night when D brought out the predator call at dark during marshmallow roasting & sounded it, sparking a response from a coyote which spooked the Boy and had him rapidly withdrawing his bravery front. He got so upset, repeating "I'm not ready! Dad..stop! I'm not ready!" He didn't sleep too well that night. But, when it came to fishing...that Boy did nothing but speak, eat & DREAM fishing.
On day 2, D took him out to place a digital tree camera in the woods. He wanted to catch some deer or other critters in the cam. Ended up, after 2 nights of leaving the cam up, they retrieved it only to find of 12 pics taken, 10 are of D's face setting it up or taking it down, with 2 that were blank, maybe a chipmunk in the brush.
Boy tried his hand at making a spear by trying very hard to whittle the end of a long stick he found with his little pocket knife. He worked at it awhile, didn't get far, but was satisfied enough to practice throwing his 'spear' at a target D placed on a tree for him.
Day 4 Boy finally caught a fish at Twin Lakes. D actually hooked it, but let the Boy reel it in. He was so proud. When they arrived back at camp, he came marching over with 2 fish on the string saying..."I wonder what's for dinner tonight!?" He showed everyone, even the dog. My Mom cooked the fish up for him and, ofcourse, we ALL had to taste his fish & comment on how delicious it was. And, soooo delicious, it was! MY BOY caught it!
Day 5, he caught another, and he was so proud. The look on a Boy's face when he has a freshly caught fish in his hand...priceless. Pure pride. Absolutely heartfelt.
When he was fishing off the bank once, a teen boy was getting out of the water & the Boy asked "Catch anthing?" The teen boy said, "Nope, but I had a few bites." Next thing I knew this boy was rigging up my sons line for him with the same thing he had on his, he said "I just want to help him get a few bites." It was so incredible seeing someone do that for my Boy. He was so happy.
D also took the boy out with his hunting blind on day 5 to wait for some coyotes. No luck. No porcupines to bat to death, no badgers. But, he did work with Boy on shooting his BB gun at an empty milk jug. To which I must brag...MY BOY is an amazing aim & straight shot. Yeah, I got me a little outdoors man. Master Caster when it comes to fishing too. I'm not bragging...just telling the absolute truth. Really.
On the last day, I took him to fish off the bank. My Dad had rigged up a spinner on his line. No bait. 'Fish Juice', so he told me Papa put on his hook. As we approached the bank, an elderly Man was bringing his boat in, and had a big Brown & Rainbow trout in his boat. He proceeded to tell Beau that he lost an even bigger one out in the water, far from where we were fishing. Boy was rather upset, but the Man assured him he had the right gear. He liked that, fished awhile before another Man fly fishing from his boat, immediately caught a fish. This had the boy a little more disgruntled. Quite the competitive little guy. He then attempted to 'fly' fish with his little rod, I had to giggle & tell him his couldn't do that with his rod, to which he replied, "Why not?" A short but later a big eagle swooped down near up and grabbed a fish right out of the water, his face pinched up and he lost his cool "EVERYBODY IS GETTIN' A FISH BUT ME!" and nearly started to cry. But, Big Boy's don't cry. It made me giggle some more. What goes through their little minds? I had to put a stop to his casting at one point or he would never stop, he did not like this and said, "I am just gonna tell Dad that you need more sleep!"
When it was time to leave, the day we had to return home, He just could not comprehend WHY we needed to go home. He started to cry. Almost made me cry. He said, " I just want to stay here forever!"
Boy. I get you. I get it. I love that you love nature. I love that you have so much passion for the outdoors. I love that you caught some fish, and shared with everyone. I love that you bonded with Daddy and Grandpa on a whole new level. I LOVE YOU, BOY!
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