I have been getting back into church, no excuses, I know, but it was very hard to do it with the two youngest so little, and so clingy! But, now they enjoy the interaction with other children, Leah made it to the last 10 minutes this past week! She made a butterfly, and she was so proud of it, she told everyone about it that came over! Too cute!
I really enjoy church, my husband won't go, and with his rotating schedule, he often couldn't anyway, but it is important to me, and I feel so much more peace within when I do go. I will admit, I don't pray everyday, we don't bless every meal, but I am working on it. Life got so busy the past 2 years for me, and so I fell behind. I feel terrible for this, and long for a much stronger bond with God. I grew up in the church, Christian, and now attend a Non-denominational, but primarily Christian church. I adore the pastor, and have gone to him a few times in the past 2 years for prayer to help me get through some things that were very hard on me. But, one thing I do not understand, is that when I go to church, I find that I am on the verge of tears throughout the service, as well as on the drive there in the morning. I try to hold back, but it's like I just want to let go, completely! I don't get it! Is this common? Is this normal? Just wondering if any of you have any idea why I might feel this way...
I find sometimes on my way home from work at near midnight, all alone in the car, quiet, time for me to think, which I hardly ever have truly this time to myself other than this time of night, I start to just ball, just cry all the way home. I am not a depressed person, I am so happy with my life, I love my job, my family, my kids are my pride and joy. I just don't get it :(